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Would you give up your dream life for this?

November 29th, 2019 at 06:40 am

Sorry I fell off the blogging wagon again. I miss you guys!

A lot of changes happened. DH left gov. job for private industry and a lot more money. We bought a dream house in Arlington, 15 min from the White House, so we are near a lot of things. I love this house! Beautiful, big, stylish, full of extras and details (it was build by a successful furniture upholsterer for his family, so this was quality build). I never dreamed I would be here. We sold our NYC coop, btw.

Everything was set. Hubby's job is great and he is appreciated, kids schools are great, little one got a spot in daycare... We were very happy. And then we are offered another dream. That conflicts with this one. A job in Switzerland that we always wanted. HD applied before we even bought this house, and the wheels there turn very slowly. Now we are offered this rare opportunity.

Being expats is something we wanted to do, since we were college students, studied abroad and met expats there. And I want to give kids diverse experiences and a pretty different European lifestyle... Not to mention, at their age, they would pick up French in no time.

But, we would be giving up everything here, have to purge entire house and pack up what we can take, rent it out, move schools, face new unknowns in the new job, start everything again. Plus, the cost of living is much much higher there, but his salary would be about the same (benefits and leave are better though). So it would be downsizing and living much more modestly, but we really could see and show kids so much more of the world...

14 Responses to “Would you give up your dream life for this?”

  1. Lucky Robin Says:
    1575011067

    I wouldn't.

  2. mumof2 Says:
    1575012147

    me either...you have a great life...I would save and take the kids on holidays to different countries just as amazing for them...

  3. Butterscotch Says:
    1575034678

    One thing to keep in mind is that if you and your husband are US citizens you’re still going to have to pay your income taxes in the United States even if you were living in Switzerland. So if the money in Switzerland isn’t amazing, then I just wouldn’t do it.

  4. Lots of Ideas Says:
    1575037914

    I would!

    I worked overseas for a short time, and it was one of the highlights of my career.

    If your husband has the skills/resume to get the job he has and be offered this job, he will be able to find a good job when this adventure is over.

    You will be keeping the house, so will have it to come back to.

    Your things will never mean more than the memories you will make.

    Your children will have an advantage as they move through life because of the experience.

    Life is short. I say go for the dream!

  5. jokeabee Says:
    1575041533

    Would he like the job in Switzerland? Or is it a dream because you want to live abroad? If he thinks he would like the job and not just the location then I say go for it. It sounds like he is very employable and if it turns out that you don't like the expat lifestyle you can come back.

  6. MonkeyMama Says:
    1575048663

    I would make the move, in your shoes. The house and the job? Meh. Those things are always replaceable. Plus, it sounds like the timing is good for your kids. The older they get, the more they have their own things and it's harder to make a big move. I'd take the "rare opportunity" if it meant that much to me.

  7. FrugalTexan75 Says:
    1575057054

    I think I might do it .. but I've always been interested in living overseas.

  8. Nika Says:
    1575090617

    Mumof2, we took many vacations abroad(long ones). It is not the same as living somewhere. Plus, Switzerland is so centrally located, and airport and train station are so well connected by public transport that all of Europe is within 1-3 hours. From US, just the flight alone is an ordeal.

    Butterscotch, tax situation wont be a problem.

    Jokeabee, the job... may be more stressful. In his current job, he is in a senior position with full authority over his team. In a new one, he will not be. But, on the other hand, he will have 4 extra weeks of vacation.

    Lots of Ideas, Monkey Mama, FrugalTexan, that is what I am thinking.

  9. Butterscotch Says:
    1575122166

    Okay, I only mentioned the taxes bc you said you would have to downsize and live more modestly due to the much higher cost of living. Paying taxes when you live and earn abroad (regardless of where the company is located) is unique to the United States and many people can not afford being double taxed like that.

    But if money is no issue then go for it.

  10. Nika Says:
    1575136039

    Butterscotch, money would be an issue, just not taxes. Some countries and organizations have special tax treaties, it is one of those situations, I just did not want to be too specific.

  11. Laura Says:
    1575161967


    Yes, I would. I'd make the concessions to make it work. Houses and jobs come in different versions, but this opportunity is presented now.

  12. Rune Says:
    1575215821

    I wouldn't give up my dream life for an opportunity with so many unknowns. I would be satisfied with my dream life. I've also read your blog for many years, and I feel that you would come to resent downsizing and living more modestly. Good luck in whatever you decide!

  13. scfr Says:
    1575295093

    Tough call. Love the idea of living overseas and giving your kids that experience.
    The cost of living makes it a tougher call. Any chance your DH might get an overseas assignment with his current job (with a salary adjustment to maintain something similar to current lifestyle)?

  14. lurker Says:
    1575391058

    It sounds like a great adventure! Go for it!

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